Our Adoption Story

On May 29th, 2014, our first child, Sawyer, was born via emergency C-section at Brandon Hospital at 36 weeks gestation. She weighed 4 lbs. 12 oz. and measured 19 inches long. During the eight months I was pregnant with Sawyer, we knew she wasn’t moving in utero. A perinatal specialist suspected she would be born with a physical disability, the severity of which would remain unknown until she was born. Cautiously optimistic, doctors suggested we go ahead with our baby shower. Without conclusive imaging or test results, the only thing to do was pray that her condition would not be fatal. When she arrived one month shy of her due date, we learned that her lungs and muscles had never fully developed. She was transferred to Tampa General’s NICU and after surviving for three days on life support, passed away on June 1, 2014.

The initial autopsy results pointed to SMA (Spinal Muscular Atrophy). Subsequent genetic testing however, ruled out the condition since neither my husband nor myself carries the SMA gene. Desperate for answers, we ordered a chromosomal array of Sawyer’s frozen cells to help pinpoint what went wrong. The results were inconclusive. Six months after losing her, we decided to try again for another baby.

We succeeded and became pregnant with our second daughter, Adelyse. An incredible team of doctors monitored this pregnancy closely as we juggled a multitude of appointments over the course of nine months. In addition to receiving top-notch prenatal care we were blessed with tremendous support from family, friends and coworkers. It was a nerve-wrecking nine months until October 6th, 2015 –– when baby Adelyse was born via C-section at St. Joseph’s Women’s Hospital. A healthy 8-pound baby girl, Addy was our rainbow, our miracle baby. For three beautiful months she filled our hearts with love and joy. We celebrated Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year’s with her. Holly was on maternity leave for three months following Adelyse’s birth. She returned to her classroom on January 4th, 2016. On her second day back to work, Holly received a horrifying phone call from her daughter’s daycare provider. Addy had stopped breathing in her sleep. She was rushed to the hospital, but it was too late. Despite having just received a perfect bill of health at her three-month wellness appointment, Addy’s death was attributed to S.I.D.S (Sudden Infant Death.)

Yes, we are reeling. Yes, we are heartbroken. Yes, we have so many unanswered questions answers, but we have no choice but to keep pushing forward. Our faith, friends and family have helped move us past devastation. Our love and commitment to each other has made us stronger as a couple. We’ve developed a close bond with our OB-GYN, who supports our desire to try for a third baby. While we pray for another biological child, we also pray that an adopted baby (or babies) will join our family someday soon.

Addy was the light at the end of our tunnel. She taught us the meaning of unconditional love and the value of savoring every moment. The happiness that filled our hearts is still there, and we know that somewhere God has a special child waiting for us. All parents fantasize about their child’s future. We fantasize more than most. We know what a precious gift children are and we have all the tools –– emotional and financial ––to ensure our children will be nurtured, happy and successful. We yearn to be parents. We pray that our story has allowed you to understand how deeply we would treasure a child and how very ready we are for this commitment.